Sex is a matter that can spark many complex feelings. Even the most sex-positive folks can feel confused and unsure when reflecting on the arousing, erotic mental images — otherwise known as sexual fantasies — they conjure up in their head. Getting caught up in thinking your innermost thoughts are deviant is easy. But, possibilities are that even your most taboo fantasies are normal and healthy. Evidence implies that those who have sexual fantasies experience less anxiety and a greater sense of self-esteem. Daydreaming about sex is normal, and acting on a shared fantasy may help spice up a relationship. Let us know more about theWhat are the most common sexual fantasies of men?:
What Does Having Fantasies Mean?
Concerned that your fantasy sexual escapades have a deep, dark meaning? Relax. Thinking about someone else doesn't mean that you're ready to throw in the towel when it comes to your present relationship. Possibilities are this quick thought is no big deal. They don't mean anything except the individual perhaps finds the idea and concept pleasurable. And this in itself is a good thing.
"If you are talking romantically or sexually, many couples lack creativity in the bedroom and often feel that things become boring, so their sex life dwindles. "Interestingly, some of the same couples have sexual fantasies.
Most Common Male Sex Fantasies (And How To Share Them With Your Partner)
Here are some of the most common fantasies out there, along with tips on how to share them with your partner.
Threesomes/Group Sex
A lot of people have threesomes or some form of group sex. Almost everyone, male and female, had toyed with this idea at some point. Unsurprisingly, straight guys are more likely to fantasize about sex with two females and tend to want a more active role rather than a passive one during group sex. Some guys may want to watch their partner have sex with another man without participating.
Of course, threesomes aren't for every couple, and you'll need to have a solid foundation of trust before bringing someone else into your bedroom.
That's why you should be delicate when bringing this up, and rather than only posing it as a "yes or no" question ("Want to have a threesome?"), digging into what it is that you find hot about this hypothetical situation.
"Why do you want to have a threesome? What are the benefits you expect to derive personally, relationally, sexually, practically, physically, emotionally, and spiritually? What are the risks?
BDSM
Males are more likely to fantasize about tying someone up; ladies are more likely to fantasize about being tied up. This fantasy can range from slightly rough or aggressive sex to more extreme bondage, sadism, and masochism (BDSM).
"BDSM encompasses many different kinks. "It can involve tying your partner up, spanking, and a spectrum of other behaviors. Both males and females report enjoying assuming both roles."
Some individuals enjoy the power trip of dominating, while others find a thrill in handing over control in a submissive role.
"Being dominated lets you escape from life's everyday responsibilities and relinquish the pressure to perform.
If you're unsure where to begin in sharing this fantasy with your partner, begin by talking about the feelings you're after rather than what props you want to use. Do you want to feel desired? Powerful? Subservient? Relaying this information to your partner can provide a nice transition into discussing your comfort levels with BDSM and rough play.
Even if your partner isn't willing to wield a whip or get tied up in chains, they may be open to playing with the power dynamic during sex.
Sex Outdoors
Ever thought about getting frisky on a park bench or at the beach? You're not the only one — in fact, 66% of males and 57% of females have fantasized about getting it on in a public place, and a whopping 82% of both males and females have fantasized about having sex in an "unusual" place (like in a car or at the office).
"This fantasy combines the risk of getting caught, the potential of performing (exhibitionism), and the power and excitement of breaking the rules.
This fantasy may feel less embarrassing to share because it tends to have less stigma and shame connected to it. That said, be prepared for the possibility that your partner may not be on board with the idea. And if they are, you might ask them what their reservations are rooted in.
Are they uncomfortable with the idea of being caught in the act? If so, you might be able to compromise on locations outside the bedroom that give you that sought-after rush while still providing them the privacy they need — for example, a restaurant bathroom that locks.
Masturbation
A staggering 71% of both males and females have fantasized about being masturbated by their partners. Another 68% of females and 76% of males have thought about masturbating with their partners. Some individuals also like the idea of watching their partner pleasure themselves.
Whichever way you're hoping to go, there are many different ways to share this with your partner. For example, you might verbalize it by saying, "I'm turned on by the idea of touching you until you finish. How does that sound?" Or, if you're dying for them to bring you over the edge through masturbation, you could try simply moving their hand downstairs and hope they take the hint.
Remember: masturbation can feel like a vulnerable act because you generally do it in private. If it takes your partner some time to warm up to the idea, that's normal. Take it slow, opting to touch them or ask them to touch you on other parts of your body during foreplay. That way, you can ease into this fantasy at a comfortable pace for both of you.
Tips For Approaching Your Partner With Sexual Fantasies
Now you understandwhat are the most common sexual fantasies of men?Lets see how to approach.
Trying out fantasies with your partner is thrilling and exciting. But, before you begin, you should ensure crucial aspects of experimentation are in place for utmost safety and pleasure.
Establish Consent
The most crucial thing to establish when having sex with partners is approval. It shows a partner you respect them and their body, and a sexual act without consent is assault.
Consent is explicit, non-coercive permission to engage in a certain act, in this case, one of a sexual nature. It can be revoked at any time. It is the most vital aspect of healthy sex.
Consent is not just "no means no" — but more of a "yes means yes." It looks like this:
● Consistently checking in with a partner throughout a sexual experience
● Asking explicitly if they like something before you do it
● Discontinuing an act if they ask you to stop — even if they agreed to it beforehand
Discuss Boundaries
To have the safest possible experience, you must be transparent about what it is you want and don't want. This can include:
● Set an agreed-upon plan for how the sexual encounter might go, including what is off-limits
● Establish a safe word to say when you begin to feel unnerved, so your partner knows when to stop,
The basis of these boundaries is consent, which can be relinquished at any time. Getting permission before trying anything new, even if it's something you do regularly is important.
Use Proper Protection
To avoid transmitting any STIs, ensure you practice safe sex with a condom or other barrier.
Other forms of birth control, like an IUD or spermicide, do not protect against STIs; inform your partner beforehand if you may be carrying one.
Treat Your Partner With Respect
Sex is intimate and should only be experienced somewhere and with someone who you feel safe with. Understand vulnerability must be embraced when having sex, and do not say or do anything that may make your partner feel judged. Take it slow, especially when trying new things. Voice any concerns or thoughts you may have throughout.
FAQs
How to Get Rid of Unwanted Fantasies
"People who want to eliminate unwanted fantasies may benefit from seeing a therapist, especially someone who focuses on cognitive behavioral therapy. You can speak to your doctor or look online for your needed support.
What is the root of sexual desire?
It is suggested that three brain areas host the roots of human sexuality:
● The auditory area provides stimuli that serve as cues for identifying a mate.
● An emotional area that provides cues for emotional arousal.
● A corporal area controls the physiological expressions of arousal.
